The Not So Simple Rules of Death in "8 Simple Rules": Elderly, Loss and Grief
Death is something that is far from easy to understand and just as difficult to deal with. The Henessy family we came to know and love in the show "8 Simple Rules" had to deal with this, but America also had to deal with it because not only was there a character missing on a regular show but also an actor gone.
Since this death is one that come by surprise the family has to deal with it way different than that of an expected of anticipated death. Also with this surprise death it is much harder to follow, but these stages of death can be seen in the way the family copes with Paul's death. The first of "Kubler Ross's 5 Stages of Death" is denial (26). Because of Paul's death being sudden, this was not something that he necessarily had to cope with but his family did.
We also notice anger which is stage five, especially with Kerry. Kerry has a much harder time getting over the stage of anger because of her last interactions with her dad. They were not what she wanted them to be, she used harsh words said that were not meant, but with the unexpected death following these words they burn more deeply for Kerry.
We also notice anger which is stage five, especially with Kerry. Kerry has a much harder time getting over the stage of anger because of her last interactions with her dad. They were not what she wanted them to be, she used harsh words said that were not meant, but with the unexpected death following these words they burn more deeply for Kerry.
When it comes to the third stage of bargaining this is something that Cate deals with the most. We see her talking about how this was not supposed to happen yet, they were supposed to be old with grandkids and she should have gone first.
The fourth stage is where Bridget struggles the most, and that is depression. Kerry goes out, Bridget stays home looking through photos and crying. This is very different from their regular personalities and therefore this low in emotion is very different and affects her greatly. Stage five of acceptance comes for the family as a whole. Together in Mom and Dad's bed they realize that even without Dad they are still a family and he will always be a part. Paul dying before Cate also brings takes on another theory of interpersonal communication. We see Cate talking about how it would have been easier for her to go first but in reality this is probably wrong. "Women tend to have formed more friendships and closer friendships throughout life. Often because of they have established close friendships with other women , they are less dependent emotionally on the marital relationship (27)."
Because a wife tends to be a man's only confidant the loss of a wife takes a greater toll than the loss of a husband. No one ever wants their spose to go first but in looking at this more closely, it is actually probably for the best. Cate will be able to confide in people because she has those close friendships, but Paul would have struggled with this more. Cate can make the life of her kids similar to the life before Paul's death, and though its not easy for anyone, the transition and change will be easier this way. |
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